Sunday, June 17, 2012
Estrogen overload!
Day 3 of Clomid, and I feel all these emotions. It's been different than last time. I've pretty much avoided people. Went out last night for a few drinks and had some laughs, so it hasn't all been bad. But, I definitely have tried to keep to myself and not think about anything. The crying comes so quick and unexpected. It takes me by surprise. I'm not a big crier, so it can be uncomfortable. I'm trying to stay present and deal with it. It's during these times, that I feel so alone. This process is very isolating. It's about the only thing on my mind, and that limits the interaction I want to have with people. I don't want to be a burden with my fears. I feel like an outsider to life right now. I am a prisoner to this process, and in a way my life is on hold, as I pursue having my own slice of the future.
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What can I say other than I love you and support you in anything you choose. You are experiencing something which sounds like what every woman goes through in life. Telling you might not ease the pain but allowing you to relate might give you hope for tomorrow. I love you and miss talking to you more often. Call me and we can cry together.
ReplyDeleteStarr. I'm so sorry you feel so alone. This cannot be easy for you....
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone. It only seems so.
ReplyDeleteFrom you know who.
"Nothing feels so permenant yet changes so quickly as the human emotion." It's hard to remember that when you are in the moment. I know crying was also something I didn't do very often, until I had kids. Now I'm a blubbering idiot! You crying is just getting ready for Mommyhood! You are going to be a great Mom.
ReplyDeleteAs far as being preoccupied by this process...you should be. It's your life right now. When you have a child they will become your life. If you don't have a child, you can make room in your heart for someone elses.
Any one that cares about you will be more than happy to listen to your fears and anxiety over this process and all that it brings. Don't feel like you are a burden! Let someone else do for you Starr....you don't have to struggle alone. If you need to talk....I've been through it all and I am a good listener.
Love-
Mia